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Cultural Etiquette
Cultural Dos and Taboos
• The bow is the traditional Japanese greeting. If one is greeted with a bow, one should observe carefully for future purposes of emulation. One should then bow to the same depth as one's counterpart has bowed. Indeed, the depth of the bow indicates the status relationship between you. As one bows lower, one should lower one's eyes, while one's palms should remain flat against one's thighs.
• The Japanese are very aware of Western habits, and will often greet you with a handshake. Their handshake will often be weak; this gives no indication of their assertiveness of character.
• Because age equals rank, show the greatest respect to the oldest members of the Japanese group with whom one is in contact. In general, respect for elders is a hallmark of Japanese culture.
• In formal situations, address one's Japanese counterpart with their last name plus san, meaning Mr. or Mrs. Overall, formal address, using professional titles when necessary, is the norm in Japanese culture. One should only use informal greetings and forms of address if one is invited to do so. Until that time, however, respect for this traditional culture should be exercised.
• The exchange of business cards among businessmen and women has its own protocol: Information should be printed in both English and Japanese. Cards are presented after the bow or handshake, and both hands should be used when presenting and receiving the business card (hold the card with the index finger and thumb of both hands). One should take time to read the card presented, and also make a point of memorizing all the information. Never put the card in one's back pocket, or in one's wallet, if one keeps one's wallet in one's back pocket. One should also not write on a person's business card in that person's presence. Overall, showing respect and reverence for the card is illustrative of the respect one holds for the person represented on the card.
• One should not make accusations or refuse anything directly; in the Japanese culture, negations of any sort are offered indirectly and with great subtlety.
• When one is taken out by one's host for drinks or for a meal, one's host is generally responsible for paying the bill. In this regard, one should allow one's host to order, and one should happily consume what is placed before one's self. In order to limit one's in-take of food or drink, one should decline with great refinement, making clear that one is unworthy to receive such generosity from one's host. Prefacing one's refusal with statements such as "You are too kind but I simply cannot eat another bite" will usually suffice.
• If one is invited to a Japanese home, keep in mind this is a great honor and as such, one should show great appreciation.
• As a sign of appreciation flowers, cakes, or candy are suggested gifts to be offered to one's host. Flowers, however, should not be white, as white is associated with death. Other suggested gifts include ornaments from one's home country.
• When one enters a Japanese home, one should remove one's shoes at the door. One should expect to sit cross-legged, or with one's legs to the side, around a low table with the family. Never point chopsticks at another person. When one is not using them, one should line them up on the chopstick rest. Use both hands to hold a bowl or cup that one wishes to be refilled.
• Eventually, one should reciprocate by inviting one's hosts out for a meal. Be insistent, in this regard, even if they claim a foreigner should not pay for anything.
• Japan is often referred to as a "high-context culture" where even the smallest gesture carries great meaning. Therefore, one should avoid expansive arm and hand movements, unusual facial expressions, or dramatic gestures of any kind.
• In the realm of paralanguage, note that pointing with the index finger is impolite. Instead, one should wave one's hand, palm up, toward the object being indicated. Sniffing, snorting, and spitting in public are acceptable in Japan, but nose blowing is not. When you must blow your nose, use a disposable tissue and then throw it out. The entire procedure should be done in private.
• Note that direct eye contact is not the norm. Lowering one's eyes is usually a sign of respect.
• Smiling and laughter can be confusing. Although representative of pleasure in the West, smiling and laughter may convey embarrassment, confusion, shock, or feelings of being upset in Japan.
• Silence is not as uncomfortable for the Japanese as it is for North Americans; rather, it is considered useful and generative.
• The Japanese do not approve of male-female touching in public. Even among married couple, public displays of affection should be restrained. Although those of the younger generation have begun to engage in more Westernized forms of behavior, as a visitor to Japan, adhering to more conservative norms will be well-received by one's hosts.
• Men do not engage in backslapping or other forms of touching. Ribald behavior of any sort should also be avoided.
• In conversation, the Japanese remain further apart than do North Americans. Pay attention to conventions of space.
• Dress is Japan is very important. Some experts ever suggest that some Japanese would rather spend their money on clothing rather than food! Indeed fine clothing and accessories from esteemed fashion houses are very popular in certain urban Japanese circles. In business settings, the business suit - for men and women - is the norm. In some cases, more formal attire may be required. On the street, fashionable Western attire is acceptable, and quite popular among Japanese youth. Still, one should observe the Japanese penchant for restraint in dress. One should note that vibrant colors, bold designs and flashy jewelry are not, at all, the norm in Japan. Conservative and elegant dress is the preferred fare in Japan. Women should note that revealing clothing is not acceptable, and pants are not normally worn in the workplace; full or longer length skirts are preferable. The Japanese kimono, while being beautifully illustrative of local artistry, should not be worn frivolously by Westerners on a quest to "go native."
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